We gotta big ego

We Gotta Big Ego

Ok so the other day one of my home girls asked me "Quis can i ask you a question?". So I'm like sure shoot. She asks the age old question, " Why do men lie?". Of course that was followed by " what do it mean when he say he just needs time?". Soon after that, it was " well if he don't wanna be with me, why don't he just say so?". Now the truth to these answers and i mean the HONEST truth, you women don't want to hear... or you will deny it and come up with some reason on why your dude don't fit the description. Unfortunately for u, your reading the Real Talk blog and ima give you the truth.

First in foremost before i get into this, your probably thinking "Nigga you aint Dr. Phil! What in the fuck make u a expert!?!" My reply is, look at Dr. Phil? What in the fuck make him a expert! That dude dont strike me as a nigga who got alot of pussy in his lifetime. He probably married the first piece of pussy he ever had. Now me on the other hand, i grew up in the ghetto of Saginaw, Michigan so ive dealt with my share of fucking ghetto hoodrats and whorebags. I also met good strong black women there as well. I moved to Wisconsin, so of course i had to try some white pudding and ive threw in a couple Asians and his-panic ladies just for good measure. On top of that, im friends with college grads, ex murderers, current thugs, working men and a couple lames as well, so i hear all of they stories and i can chill with all these groups. On top of that, i was raised by a gang of women and i know how ya operate. So that's why im a mothafucka expert! ( SN: Men Asian women pussy isnt side ways for real, thats just a myth  and not all white girls likes and give good blowjobs....... just most lol )

Now to the topic, What you ladies must realize about most males is, we are ego driven. ALL OF US! Every last one of us fucking males are ego driven like a mothafucka! If a male tell you he isnt, he's a mothafucking lie! I purposely say male because this includes both men and niggas ( see older post for clarification ). See just as women is all about emotions, we are all about ego. See every man in his mind, no matter how fucked up he might be, i mean the nigga could be a jobless ass nigga, who lives in a shelter and eat canned corn for dinner everyday, and he still have a ego. He still thinks he's the shit in some way shape of form. He feels he's the best nigga in the world. He wont accept he a bum ass nigga because thats not how we operate. See a male thinks... fuck in his own mind, a man KNOWS he's better than other niggas in some way and we will take that one way and turn it into most things. I mean ANYTHING! If a male beat a nigga in basketball, he think hes can out fuck that nigga to! If a nigga beat a nigga in a video game, he think he should take that niggas paycheck. Even if the nigga he beat was at home in a mansion playing on a 55 inch LED Samsung and his ass was playing in his mamas basement on a 17 inch tv, that was sitting on the old school big tv, for that small time, he thinks hes the better man. Why do u think if one nigga get 20's the next nigga need 22's, than the next nigga need 24's, then 26's and then the hard working man say fuck ya clown cars, i want a benz! Its all ego! Im a better man than u. Now i have to say all of this so u have a understanding how the male ego works.

Now why wont a man let u leave even when he know he don't want u? First off, a man would, but a nigga? he wont! Why? EGO! He cant let no other man win! He has to be number 1 to u even if he don't want yo ass. A mans ego cant accept the fact of knowing u might be enjoying another dick more than his. His ego cant take it. He cant let you go and risk the fact that another man can possibly show you what you missing. NO WAY! That nigga will do whatever necessary to keep yo ass at arms length. See ya women like to play the " Well just do u and ima do me" shit. That bullshit dont work lol... see a nigga know u gone say that dumb ass shit. You know what that meant to him? " Just give me some dick so i can shut the fuck up". He will dick u down and u will be once again confused. See a nigga will never tell u its ok for u to move on. why? He doesnt want u too! If it was up to males, every chick hes ever fucked in life would never fuck another man ever and stalk ass forever. Everything males do is for the affection of a female. We don't get fly for us. We dont buy nice cars for us... We do it for new pussy! We do shit to make every female say "hes the best man out here". So do this man that wont let u leave have some deep connection to you because he say, " I love you and u know i wanna be with you"? HELL NO! Its ego! If he really wanted you, he would be with you! period! Something about u he dont want! He might like the pussy or something but he don't want you. What you have to do is understand, that nigga will never make you his queen. If his other options dry up, he might come back in gas u up for a ride for a lil minute, but he will never actually buy the car. Just leasing yo ass until some new shit come out.

"What does he mean when he say he just need time?". Look, all this shit means is one of 3 things. Now your situation will determine which one that it is.

1.) He got a better fucking option! See maybe at some point he was feeling you until a better option came through. You know what "time" means? " " hey i just need some time to see if this new bitch is really that bitch or not. If she aint on shit, ima come back and fuck with you though". EGO! He just keeps u there just in case. See males like to have just in case pussy. Men and Niggas both. Now men, never act on the impulse to fuck the just in case pussy. Niggas, have every intention on fucking them and adding more to the fucking collection. See in life u need safety nets. You always gotta be prepared for anything and in case of a fire you have a extinguisher, so with women males like to have the option in case of emergency. See nothing hurts the ego of a male more than being played and not being able to say " watever bitch! I gotta plenty other hoes". So your basically the fall back bitch!

2) He never really was wifing u up in the first place. You probably put some stipulation on ya situation, so he told you what he had to tell you to get what he wanted. Once he was done, it served him no purpose to continue to lie to yo ass. If you be on some " i only do this or dat with my man shit" he will tell you what u need to hear. Is that his fault? No its yours for thinking a stipulation gone change the situation. ( Read "Yes Your Still A Hoe'" For further details )

3.) Bitch your annoying and your getting on his damn nerves! All that constant naggin and ignorant bitching makes a male not wanna deal with yo ass. See the ego tells him, this bitch pressed! She acting crazy cause i fucked the shit outta her. See he know it serves no point to keep talking to u because he can call you at any time and your going. He can comfortably not deal with your annoying ass because he know you got DDS and aint going no damn where.

Now this was a little longer than usual because this is a complicated topic. Truth is, its alot more to this shit maybe i will do a part 2 one day. With all of this said, the problem isnt the man lying, the problem is you dont understand why that man is lying. All that its ok do u bullshit dont fly cause we know better. U dont really want him too, and he is already doing him, but he loves to see you miserable than a mothafucka! You wanna pull some shit? Tell that dude that u met some new guy and he's the shit! He's been cooking for you, he makes you laugh and the sex is the shit!!! You dont even have to have nobody just say it! Now... i would suggest over the phone because he might just give u a jab to yo temple in person. Now you will get a couple responses.

1.) He Will tell you what he really think about you. He  will call you a hoe, or say u aint shit. Or ask some corny homo shit like " Is his dick bigger than mine?". ( He's gets emotional because his ego is hurt. )

2) He will play it cool but ask egotistical arrogant ass questions like " Oh thats cool... I mean im happy you found someone who makes you happy." Dont be fooled by this comment. Give this guy about 2 weeks. he will call and "check" on your new dude. He want to see if your still happy... not really he want u to say you miss him and the new guy dont compare. ALL EGO! If you still all happy with the new dude and aint calling him and ignoring his calls, his ego gets hurt. He will eventually leave u alone, but the whole time he thinks " she fuck with that nigga but if i run into her somewhere, nigga i can still hit".

3.) That nigga just hang up the phone on yo ass and dont call back. Now he actually cared about u and not only was his ego hurt, he's disappointed in your decision and he dont wanna say nothing at all... This might be the nigga you wanna call back!

Top 8 Kill Yo Self Idiot Stories Of 2010

Number One Idiot
I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center.
Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants.
I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital.She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants.
I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.
Quis's Thoughts: Dumb ass bitch! How u gone poision yo damn damn daughter thinking it would help??
Number Two Idiot
Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s.They were successful in getting it out of the plane and home.
Shortly after they took it for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming toward them.
It turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated.They are no longer employed at Boeing.
Quis's thoughts: What in the fuck u gone do with a stole raft? smh.....
 

Number Three Idiot
A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the Branch and wrote this, "Put all your muny in this bag."
While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window.So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line, he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller.She read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America.Looking somewhat defeated, the man said, ok  and left.He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.
Quis's thought: See this what listening to Gucci man can do to your child. Like u need the correct bank slip to ROB THEM!!! Dumb ass nigga
 

Number Four Idiot
A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car.He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car.Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40.
Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture, this time of handcuffs.He immediately mailed in his $40.
Quis's Thought: Now this shit was funny..lol... Thats some nigga shit! When they sent him the cuffs, he shouldve sent they ass a picture of a hooker....
 

Number Five Idiot
A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer.After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf.  He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are over 21."
The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him.
At this point, the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk.
The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in the bag.The robber then ran from the store with his loot.
The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license.They arrested the robber two hours later.
Quis's Thought: This nigga has to be the dumbest mothafucka off all time.... and i aint talking about the robber, im talking about the damn cashier! Stupid ass nigga! He got a SHOTGUN DUMBASS! I wouldve gave the nigga the scotch and a pack of rillos.
Idiot Number Six
A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously waving revolvers.
The first one shouted, "Nobody move!"When his partner moved, the startled first bandit shot him.
Quis's thought: Would be a Michigan nigga lol.
Idiot Number Seven :
Seems this guy wanted some beer pretty badly.
He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run.
So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window.  The cinder block bounced back knocking him unconscious.
It seems the liquor store window was made of Plexi-Glass.
The whole event was caught on videotape.
Quis's Thought: " hi my name is dumbass mothafucka and i have a alcohol problem." Hi dumbass!
 

Idiot Number Eight
.I live in a semi-rural area
We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the Deer Crossing sign on our road.
The reason:"Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!  I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore"
 
Quis's Thought: i mean damn

The Winner Is

And the Winner Is

This one will be just a quick blog today. Just a personal observation and opinion that all. Ladies ya might not like this one as much or understand it, but the fellas ya might feel me on this one. Im starting to think pussy is like a boxer. When you first meet the pussy, it has all of the skills and talent in the world. Its driven to be the best pussy you have ever had. Its like the world champion of pussy! First round knockouts are common than a mothafucka! Even when you think your holding your own, the Iron Mike of pussy gives yo ass one haymaker and your down for the count!!! Like the pussy be The Greatest of All Time on some Muhammed Ali shit. As soon as the Manny Pussyiao gets comfortable being the champion, it starts to lose its drive. Then u just end up with Contender pussy. You know contender pussy, you win a round, it wins round, but u can start going the distance with the pussy. Sometimes you might get a win with the pussy, other times you duel the pussy to a draw. Its just not as reactive as Championship Pussy used to be. Once the pussy is out of its prime, then u start getting sparring partner pussy. All u do is just beat up on the pussy and since the pussy know its job, it just comes back for a pounding. How quick the champion is just a old shell of it self….. So the competitive nature of us fellas tell us to do what? Yea u guessed it! Look for some brand new UFC MMA pussy!!!! Yea time to go triangle choke some pussy!

Build A Bitch

Build A Bitch

So as I sat up half of the damn night with insomnia last night, I was flicking around the channels trying to find something to watch. After watching Deadly Women and Andre Johnson beat the dog shit outta Courtlin Finnegan over and over again…. And over again…. Well I watched that shit alone for like 30 minutes because he gave that boy that 3 piece and a biscuit on National TV!  After I got tired of seeing AJ go all MMA on the football field, I continued my search to find something to watch. I run pass a show with a titled that caught my eye “ My Small Beast and I”. I was thinking what in the hell? So it was this documentary about these 3 British women with really small breast. So I watch it and all  women had these  different ways to improve their breast. One lady used some device that made her titties swollen for   like 3 months with hopes to enlarge them, so other lady went with the usual surgery option ( later realized her broke azz couldn’t afford and started saying “well Im kinda at one with my body”) and the other lady took some pictures that was therapeutic and accepted she just was gone have these little ass titties forever. So after this interesting show goes off, the next show comes on was about women and their lust to lose weight. So then it hit me, this shit isn’t fair! This isn’t a level playing field no more You don’t know what the hell u getting when u meet a women anymore, because now adays you can really Build A Bitch!

Now with all of these surgery’s to enhanced Breast, liposuction, plastic surgery and the new phenomenon “The Azz Shot”, a bitch can really change her whole damn appearance. There’s no such thing as a dime no more. Now, you can go meet the ugliest bitch in the world and build u a bitch if yo money right. Even if yo money aint right, then you go get youa template bitch.  A template bitch is a bitch that has the qualities you cant afford. You cant afford the breast implants and the nose job? No problem, go get u a ugly bitch with big tittys and a nice nose. You cant afford the azz shots and the lipo? Cool, get you a skinny bitch with a nice bubble. You cant afford none of that shit? Then take yo chances with one of these booshee ass women out here…. But if you want to take this option don’t worry it will get easier in the next few years because they aint gone be able to compete with these Build A Bitches. I mean you can look at some of these celebs like Nikki Minaj.. That’s a true Build A Bitch! See a nigga didn’t have the money for plastic surgery, so they took a cute bitch and Mrs. Potato Head’d the fuck outta her ass! Put a big stupid ass and tits on her and now who cares what she’s rapping about because all the men can think of is “DAMN! NIgga do u see her ass?” and all the women can think off “ DAMN! Bitch do you see her ass?”! Now all the men and women want to rebuild that bitch!   

Now we must also think about all the things out here to help u build a bitch as well. Any negative thing on a women now days is fixable! Women there is no need to feel insecure about nothing.. Just get yo money up, and rebuild yo shit! I mean there is no reason for a women to not be right now adays. Im not understanding how some of u ladies is walking around spoiled milk pussy with a whole damn isle at every grocery store, Walgreens and Walmart in the world specifically build to keep yo pussy fresh! I don’t understand how some of ya hair isn’t up to par with all of these damn curling irons and perms and just for ladies and spritz and shit out here. Even yo gear should be up! If u cant afford the Gucci? Bitch get the knock off joint! There is no reason why yo mothafucking ass shouldn’t be out here looking good! You cant afford yo titty’s? Fool us! Put some rice and stocking and stuff yo bra… ( yea I know about that damn trick you slick ass mothafuckas! ) See men we just out here! There isn’t no help for us. U born fucked up? Nigga u betta hope u was blessed with a horse dick! U born a pretty boy with a little joint? U better hope ur a blessed carpet muncher. Ur born ugly with a little joint? Then nigga u better rob every mothafucka u can because you gone need some bread to pull a bitch! See now is that fair? Women got all types of shit and all we got is what we were born with or some damn penis pills! Smh…. Bad part is, once the build a bitch done transformed to Super Bitch, she starts to hate on all u regular niggas and women. This is just not fair! Some of u aint gone realized this until 10 yrs from now when these build a bitches become the normal thing. So fellas im telling u right now, don’t be thirsty and get at these fine ass chicks. Get u a low self esteem, fat bitch and build u yo perfect bitch! Everything u need is out here to do it!

DDS and PPS disease

There is a Cure

Ive been on a hiatus a little bit taking care of some of my other interests that I partake in, but I had to come back and write on a disease that is sweeping the nation. Its something that ladies and males all over the world is being infected with. Its really destroying lives, making people make bad choices and its also affecting the lives of the kids that’s being raised in the world. This disease is a very very serious infection. Once you are infected with this disease, its very hard to cure it. You have to understand this is a serious problem and the only way to get rid of it is through help. The first step to recovery is admitting you have a problem. The disease for women are referred to as DDS and for men PPS. I will break down the symptoms of each of these terrible diseases and ways you can possibly cure them.

Dicked Down Syndrome or DDS is a serious problem for females. It makes them do all types of illogical things. This disease cause womens to do a lot of things that they know is wrong but just cant help. See women affected with this disease seem to be unaware that they suffer from DDS. A lot of times they confused this with love or loyalty… No mama u are affected with DDS! As soon as he bent u over, pulled your hair and made your legs feel like spaghetti noodles, you were infected. From that point you started doing things that lets me know just how infected you were. So I will list a couple things to let u know if you are infected with these things.

#1. If this niggas beats yo ass and you say “ ya just don’t understand he’s not that bad and sometimes I be pushing him”. You are a level 2 DDS patient with yo silly ass.

#2. If you find yourself paying for all the bills and he find him self paying for the new air force ones. You are a level 3 DDS paitent....once again... with yo silly ass!

#3 If he tell you the baby that looks just like his dumb ass isn’t his and your still with him, you suffer from a level 4 infection.... with yo ol silly ass!

#4 This Is the worst ladies, if you know GOT DAMN WELL this nigga aint worth a fuck and you turn down another good ass nigga who you KNOW is a good man because his dick isn’t as big as yo other shitty ass, beat on u, no bill paying ass bum ass nigga u with, YOU suffer from a level 5 infection and there is no cure for yo dumb ass! You will probably end up a victim or a fucking whorebag once u find out he boned yo sister and your best friend.

The Cure to DDS is only one thing…. YOU! Believe u are a bad bitch and u don’t have to deal with his bum ass bullshit even though the dick good. It is a nigga out here that will fuck u, feed u and finance u… with half! U better come with your half or else your man suffers from…

PPS or Pussy Putdown Syndrome. See now males who get this disease generally becomes infected with another disease called SFL syndrome or SUCKA FA LOVE syndrome. Now  for u ol sucka ass niggas, I aint even gone go into as much detail because u bums disgust me!  But PPS is usually detected by high levels of jealousness. You will usually see things like going through your phone, popping up at places you said you were at and stalking your facebook pages. These are the abusive if I cant have u nobody else can ass niggas. See sucka fa love ass niggas will buy yo ass one drink and think no other niggas can talk to u, so once u give that guy  PPS , he becomes the guy that buy u a drink and hold yo damn straw to make sure u don’t talk to nobody… Sorry but I cant even type no more about these sucka ass nigga! U want a cure? Nigga BEAT OFF! Get to know yoself and u wouldn’t be such a fucking sucka!

In closing, if u suffer from anyone of these diseases….. u are probably out here bad and all of your friends talk about how dumb and bitch made u are behind your back. So I hope women you learn to know you are a bad bitch and u don’t have to settle with a nigga cause he fucked your brains out and fellas …. Just quit being a ol sucka ass bitch ass hoe ass YOU MY BITCH ass nigga and go to your nearest Walgreens and grab u some Vaseline…..or lotion…. Or baby oil… or my personal favorite Baby Oil Gel! Then u wouldn’t be so fucking sprung on some pussy…… and u can suffer from GHS like me! But that’s another topic….

I Cant Stand Niggas

Now over the last 100 yrs or so, its been a big uproar of the "N" word....matter a fact, what the fuck is a "N" word? Just say the damn word world. NIGGA! There we said it! All black, white, hispanic and Asians say it with me. NIGGA! Its ok! Im sure at one point everybody has said NIGGA! Now what people must understand about this word is that its not a race. When i say i cant stand NIGGA's, im not talking about a race, but more so of a mindset. See alot of people confuse "Nigger" with "Nigga". See "Nigger" was a term used by slave owners to offend and make slaves feel less of human beings. "Nigger" was a slang term borrowed from the term "Niggu" which actually means Kings in a ancient african language. Now im not going to give ya no history lesson, but google it and read up on it and you will be like damn Q just put me up on some game. Now, as for "nigga"? This mindset was created a looooong time again right before slavery started.

See once upon a time in Africa, it was a place where black people all lived like kings and queens. They wore gold and diamonds and ran around butt ass naked doing the hustle and shit. They used to just get fucked up, dance and make kids...kind of like todays culture, but they actually took care of their families and raised kids as a village..... in other words "The BEAT THEY LIL ASS's!". Now why this celebration of life was happening, it was these 2 dudes who was like "Man i want my own shit! I dont want to just be living like a king with the rest of these people. Lets go somewhere and be THEE KING". Yep... Fucking NIGGAS! See niggas aint never happy with SHIT! They always want some mo shit even when everything all good. A nigga always want to out do somebody, but as always how do a nigga go about this? With some ignorant ass shit! Now we will get back to these Niggas shortly.
While these 2 african niggas was plottin, it was this other nigga name Christopher Columbus with the same idea. Now this nigga had a little money and backing behind him. Now ya know niggas dont know how to act with no damn money! So this nigga come to a place name a america and was like "O this some smooth shit! Im going to take this shit OVER!". So he kicked it with the Indians for a couple months (for free! Didnt hunt one animal or nothing. Just like a nigga to eat and live rent free ) smoked on their pipes ( just like a nigga to smoke up yo shit that they aint paid for ) and then just as they thought he was cool, he came back and robbed they ass ( just like a nigga to skeem on his people.) Now that this nigga plan was in place, he had to get him some mo niggas to help him build his shit up.

Now back to these other niggas, so Chris sends a bigs ass boat to Africa that had a big ass sign on it that read "Free BOATRIDE". Now ya know, niggas love free! So these 2 niggas was like "O shit! Free? Nigga lets go tell everybody!" So these 2 niggas tell all of these kings and queens that they bought a boad to take everyone on a free boatride. Yep u know niggas always lying to make themselves look like some larger than life type of people. So what happened? They hopped on that boat and aint been free since.
Now adays, niggas are everywhere but you can understand why because it wasnt the white man that founded this country, it was a nigga! There is no logical explanation for the ignorance we see in this world. Their is no scientific reason why mothers put babies in the microwave on 10, and grown ass men wear skinny jeans, or people who argue about shooting each other on the internet, or grown ass women shaking they ass in front a web cam for attention. They all just suffer from Niggadom. Its been so many niggas overtime who has made their mark like Bush, Lindsey Lohan, Mister Rogers... yea Mister Rogers! He was too a nigga! This nigga wore the same shit everyday and just switched up his shows to keep it fresh! Thats some nigga shit! See niggas will always be around. They come in all races and social classes. People shouldnt get offended by the "N" word because it dont refer to a race. Just a mindset! I love people, but i cant stand fucking niggas! See its niggas who make it rain with they rent money, it was niggas who stole all of them investors money with Enron, it was niggas who thought it would be a good idea to sell Ramen Noodles for 10cent... ok shot out to the niggas who came up with that one! lol..... So the next time you hear someone talk about how they are going to buy something in front of you, when they owe YOU money, just simply in the middle of them talking say " I cant stand niggas!".

I cant stand niggas!

Top 10 things that makes you look stupid to the Opposite Sex

The Top 10 things that makes you look stupid As Hell to the opposite sex

Fellas:
1. If you have a lil dick , dont pull out no trojan Magnum before you get some.

2. Dont say your getting money and you always broke.

3. Dont pick up a girl in a car on 26's and ask her for gas money.

4. Dont talk about how you going to beat the pussy up and cum before the commercials are over.

5. Dont talk bad about your baby mama, but you NEVER EVER have your own child!

6. Trying to smooth talk a woman, but your breath smells like you've been eating liver and ass sandwiches.

7. Putting cologne over musk.

8. If you have a crib with no furniture in it and actually have the nerves to invite the chick over.

9. Take her out to eat a fast food spot and give her a price limit on what she can spend..... o ya niggas know what i mean. " Hey bae i aint got no money so u betta get a double cheeseburger and a value fry".

10. If your 25 or older and still wears 4 different chains at one time.


Women
1. This phrase " Im sorry but you know i dont be sucking dick like that! " ( WTF is like that? )

2. Too much make up on.... If i can spell my name in your face, your over doing it baby.

3. Your idea of dinner is Easy Mac.

4. You try to pull some bullshit in real life that you heard in a song. ( Pull that Beyonce Independant Women shit if you want and you gone pay all the bills, bills, bills, in this bitch! )

5. Telling your friend who want to fuck us how good we fuck you!

6. Being musty in the club..... and why in the fuck is the musty ass chick the one who always got her fucking arms up on every damn song??

7. You got 3 kids and 4 baby daddy's....... lol... I know a chick with this issue...dumb ass broad

8. Having a issue with your man and asking his friends for advice....

9. Not acknowledging the fact you are getting fat, and wearing clothes that are just WRONG and yelling "boy i just done got thick." If your ankle looks like a rump roast in them hills baby, that aint thick... thats boarderline obese.

10. Calling another girl a hoe, when your one... ( see post below..Yes Your Still A Hoe for details......HOE! lmao)

What She Really Means

What up ladies and gents? Today's topic will be about what ladies REALLY mean. See ladies have this special coded language that most dudes dont understand. Its a real smooth language that they KNOW most men wont be able to deciper. Lucky for you dudes, i understand it! I was raised by more women then anything, so over the years ive decoded this language for the ages. Im going to have a list of phrases, and let you fellas know REALLY what she means.


" Why dont you ever hold me no more?"


Ok fellas this is a complicated statement right here. The first thing you can do to fail her test is say "aww baby come here". She dont want you to do that! Her point was to inform you that "nigga you know i got some other niggas willing to do what your ass aint doing right?" The word "hold" is code for alot of things. It also means talk, taking her out to social settings and fucking! Yep what she is telling you is, nigga i dont have that feeling for you that i used to have. I used to get this feeling when you held me, talked to me or just looked at me that i no longer get....but i could probably get it from that dude over there.


" Baby its not about the size as long as i like it. thats all you should worry bout!"


Ok fellas to women, SIZE DOES MATTER! They lying! Now the truth is, do it mean they wont enjoy sex with you? No! As long as u got about 6, u iight,(anything under that though fellas, It might be kinda rough for you out here") but its just like us looking at Buffy's ass or Pamela Lee titties...its just good to look at! Women just like knowing the fact that they man got something huge down there. Truth be told, most women dont even enjoy getting banged by some 10 inch joint like that, but they enjoy having the option. I know this beautiful black women who said to me " yea my 50" tv broke and now im watching this 46" tv... i need my 50"! Those 4 inches are important". Now technically is watching that 46" and 50" THAT much different? No! But she like knowing that she got a 50! So all she is telling you is, " baby yo shit aint beasting or nothing, but i can deal with it because i love you....". Nigga please believe though, if they come out with a penis pill that really increased your size by 3 inches, you would be getting a supply on your birthday!


" I dont need this shit! I can do bad by myself!"


This right here in female talk means, " Nigga u a fucking bum!"...... in a nice way. Its her way of saying yo broke ass brings absolutley nothing to the table. Not a fork, napkin, chicken nugget or nothing. She is saying for the kinda of person you are, she rather be by her self. Now to truly understand this comment fellas, its not totally referring to money. She means all around the board. You are not challenging her mentally or physically. She dont enjoy your conversation or mindset at all! See even if you broke, if a women feels like you serve a purpose beyond that, then she will attempt to put u up on game. If she feel not only is this nigga a broke nigga, he a ol stupid nigga who cant even carry a conversation? She can do it by herself. See fellas the truth is, good sex wont keep a WOMAN around. A HOE? Yerp! A HOMAN ( thats like a hybrid hoe and woman..they exist nigga) ? maybe... but a WOMAN? Na! A woman knows she can get good sex elsewhere and she prolly keep 2 or 3 toys on stash that she enjoy more than any dick any way. So to keep a woman homie, you gotta keep yo mental game up too.


Now fellas pay close attention to this right here..... This is a lie that a female will tell yo black ass! Ive even got caught in this lie before. Its the smoothest shit and it also works 99.9% of the time. Its a dangerous line fellas. Pay cloooose attention.


" Its ok! Im on birthcontrol"


Nigga!!!! They will tell you this RIGHT before you almost to that moment and now i know this is tough to do but you have to hop out of the couchee. Its a set up! She is really not on birth control. That lady know in that moment your going be like "fuck it" and then they hit u a month later saying they are pregnant. Now what you must know is, that girl more than likely was already pregnant, but the male she know is prolly the BD, dont want sh*t to do with her ass. So she choose you because you seem alot more responsible and probably will give her abortion money. When you hear "Its ok im on birth control" STOP NIGGGGGA! O please stop! If you dont, i promise i will be watching yo ass on Maury and we will be watching her give a " ima 150% sure" speech and then running back stage saying Aghhhhhhhhhh!

My Dream Girl

Today a nigga feeling poetic! Let this simmer with ya! See im not always just bogus and silly. Sometimes i can be sensitive and thought provoken.


My Dream Girl.....
I miss you alot. I used to see you all the time now not as much. I remember the first time I saw you I just knew you was the one I always wanted. Beautiful, Smart, Witty and Attractive. You were almost too good to be true. It was like I created you and you were sent to me free of charge. It kinda hurts now that I rarely see you now. I know a couple times you had to leave and better your life so I let you. I still held you down like a man was suppose to and just when that burden felt to heavy to hold you always came back. It was like your timing was right on point all the time. Lately you dont spend any time with me. I know I sound a little different than I usually do, but its just the way you made me feel. I try to deal with the time in between seeing you and not seeing you as best as I can but now the time in between is too long. The burden is too heavy. I guess no matter how good a dream is we always wake up. I guess my 8 hours of sleep was up and it was time to go back to reality. Even in reality though, I think of the first time I dreamed about you. That dream just wont go away. So even though my dream is not coming true right now and I dont blame you or me, because as long as I live I have another night of sleep and another chance of seeing you again.....

Males vs Men

Males and Niggas Vs Men

"Men aint shit! They all the same!". This is a statement that most females have said... o wait, "Niggas aint shit! They all the same!". Now that i covered even my ghetto mami's, i can say these are things ALL females have said. I can understand why women would make this statement and honestly, i partially agree. Niggas? aint shit! Most males? Aint shit! BUT MEN? are thee shit! See the question alot of females fail to ask themselves is, " why i keep getting these shitty ass dudes?". The answer? Its yo ass! Why is there alot of females that are totally happy and have VERY good men? Because they have MEN! There is a big difference between men and males. Every male with a penis aint a men! You women have to realize the difference before you ever find you a good man, until you know the differences between the 2, you will always get cheated on, beat on, disrespected, used and dog'd and your the blame. Yes YOU are the blame! Its not that nigga or males fault. They tell you exactly who they are from the get go, but that good dick from the back or that nice car cloud yo damn judgement. Lucky for you ladies, im going to explain the difference between the 2. Im also going to give you the game on what to look for if you want a relationship.

A nigga and a male is completely different just like a whorebag and a woman are completely different. When women see your friends come over she try to cook or be a hostess. She want your friends to say "damn bro u got it good! I need to get me one of them.". A whorebag on the other hand, she want to sit up under ya ass and giggle and laugh with ya because she want your friends to say "damn she cool... i bet i can fuck his bitch if i wanted too!". Males and Men aint much different. Males think that your friends is his friends. He think that your more like a stepping stone rather than the mountain. The male look at you like your only as good as his  next option. You might be iight, but that bad bitch over there is better. Her ass is fatter, her face is better and he cant wait for a chance to see if her pussy is better! Until them other options give a notion that its a go, he setttling with yo ass. Now MEN on the other hand, every chick they see and meet,  they to realize if that female is a bad bitch, but they are comparing her to you. See a man understand the value in a woman. A MAN wont risk losing a woman for a whorebag so even if she has a better ass and face, he aint gone risk losing this girl that accept his flaws. See a man understand his shortcomings and he look to his better half to be whatever he is not and to also make him comfortable with those shortcomings. A man understand his money, he understand his looks, he understand his dick, he understand his attitude and he also understand his better half also do and accept him as is. He's not judging his woman on the factors she might think. He's not judging her off if her ass fat, he's judging her on if i die will this woman hold my kids down! He's judging her on can i acheive things with her! Will my mama like her? If my boys tried to fuck would she put them in they place and let me know about it. If i wasnt around will she rep me like i was there myself! As much as women look to a man for protection, MEN look at their woman for that same feel. She protects you from yourself! A man can still be a male/nigga at times just like a woman could  be a whorebag, but that woman protects that man from doing dumb shit by doing her job! In return, that man feels a obligation to make sure his woman is taken care of. He protects her, he makes her smile, he holds her, he talks to her about life because she is HIS LIFE and his BETTER HALF! A man will accept the fact his woman got a past and has flaws as well. A good man isnt going to allow his woman to walk around with those flaws without attempting to fix them and making her a better woman. To the same point, a woman is gone allow her man to fix her flaws. A woman understands the difference between being independant, and ignorant. If you want a relationship, its not about you being independant, but its about ya being codependant!

For all you women who wonder why ya keep getting bad males, its either because your getting Niggas and Males, or maybe your a whorebag and not a woman your damn self! Ima give some game to the  fellas and ladies. You want to know what a successful relationship is like? U really do? ok.............................. sorry i had to make yo sweat a little bit! haha..... but the answer is, its BORING! Its really fucking boring! Ya take ya ass to work, ya save up ya money, ya follow ya plan as far as goals, take care of ya kids and in the process, ya create fun moments with each other. TOGETHER, needs to be ya fun! When ya around each other, ya need to enjoy that. I dont mean at no club together, i mean at home while ya cooking, washing clothes, washing ya cars, play the PS3 together, watch her corny reality shows, watch the NFL game with him baby and if it gets boring to u, give him a blowjob! Ya interaction with each other is the fun! Every now and then, fellas take ya girl on a trip! Buy her something nice and make her feel important. Every now then ladies, come home turn the lights off and strip for your man, give him a pedicure or something.  Other times, let your girl go have her fun with the girls and ladies let that men go to the strip club or something to see another chick or something. Thats how you keep your relationship strong! IF your lady aint complying, get rid of that whorebag. If your man aint complying, then you just learned the difference between a male and man!

Beat They Lil Ass!

Beat They Lil Ass!

Todays entry will be about something that irritates the shit outta me personally….bad ass kids! I cant stand bad ass kids! I cant stand that kid that come into the store with they parents and yell and throw tempter tamp trams about a damn toy! Whats even worse, is when the wack ass parent sit there and negotiate with they kid. Negotiate? With a kid? Shittttt… only thing my grandma use to negotiate with me about was the switch! If I got a switch that she deemed unacceptable, she sent me right back to the tree to get another one. Now adays, people sit there and offer they kids ice cream to go in a store and behave. My moms gave me the “boy don’t go in this store acting no fool! I will beat yo ass right in this store!” speech. Now a lot of times when im around people with bad ass kids, they give u a warning like “im telling you now, my kids bad”. I always think, na yo kids aint bad, you just a bad ass parent and u need to call 1800-Beat-Akid. There is specialist all over the world! U just have to call and have us come through. So today for you parents who think you have “bad ass kids”, ima tell you everything that’s a beat yo kids ass offense.

#1. If your kid uses curst words on the regular, this is the time when you call a specialist like myself, to BEAT THEY MOTHAFUCKIN ASS! You don’t let them say fuck, shit and bitch like they grown. Your over grown ass bout sit there and laugh like “see I told u they bad”. No they aint bad, but u a bad parent! As soon as a specialist like me is around and they say those words, I bring a belt out the sky blue and BEAT THEY ASS! I aint saying watch yo mouth or none of that shit! U beat they ass right off of top, and afterwards when that kid is sitting there with snot running out of they nose and doing the sniffles, u ask them some shit that will fuck they whole head up… “ U want something to eat?” Now u know damn well that kid aint hungry after that whopping, but what that do is let them know who's in charge. Yea u beat they ass and feed them, then afterwards you send they ass to clean YO room. Yea YO room! U know why, cause u hope they say “well I aint mess up yo room why I gotta clean it?”. Then u know what u do? U BEAT THEY ASS AGAIN! Straight up! Then that kid will learn, maybe I shouldn’t question this mothafucka because they beasting with that damn belt! See yo kids have to fear you! U can be friends and shit later when their older, but while they young u beat they mothafucking ass! Once they are frightened by the look, ( this becomes effective after you have let it be know u will tear they lil fucking ass up! ) then u can start talking to them. Until then though, you beat they ass! Watch how respectful they be to yo ass!

#2. When you ask someone to baby sit yo bad ass kids, you must be prepared to give them full responsibility to BEAT THEY ASS! Now I understand some people don’t want other people to beat they kids, and that’s why u have to follow #1, BUT even being, kids have a tendency to try people who aint they parents. Now its important u let other people beat they mothafuckin ass too though! See it’s a bigger lesson to learn. When they grow up and is out in the streets, if they disrespect someone they will get they ass beat! They cant count on mama and daddy to save them, so its imperative, that they learn early at any given time my ass can be beat! When other people have the authority to get in that ass, kids tend to think twice. They tend to weigh out pros and cons which will help them in life as they get older. They gone be a little bit more like, “damn…. Fuck it! I don’t feel like getting my ass whop!”. Now if u one of them people that say “well I don’t want nobody touching my kid”, I understand… and u shouldn’t be asking nobody to watch them little mothafuckas either! If u ask a nigga like me to watch yo kid, and they jumping on my shit, or breaking my shit, im breaking they mothafuckin ass! I aint bullshitting either! I can promise you one thing, I don’t know how they will come to my house, but they will leave that bitch like they went to bootcamp. They will come home washing all types of dishes. See if you punk ass parents stop being “friends” and start being “parents” you wouldn’t need a nigga like me to beat respect in yo damn kids.

Now im not saying nobody should abuse they kids, I just think you should beat they fucking ass! Once they reach teenage years, you no longer use a belt….that’s just excessive ass whoppins and that’s wrong… that is the part when you start punching them in they mothafuckin chest! For real, hit that nigga dead in his shit! If it’s a girl, u tell her mama to body slam her ass! U must let them know, “nigga u aint that big! I’ll still fuck u up!”. Its important to the mindset of your child. Even though I could prolly whop my mama ass, I would never try it. Why? Cause that heffa crazy! Im not running up on that lady! THAT’S how your kids pose to look at u! As a fucking parent and not a buddy! U don’t sit there and let they young ass smoke blunts with u! U take they blunt, beat they ass, and then smoke up they shit while they watch! U let them see how wasting that $20 wasn’t the way to go! If yor pussy ass still don’t want to whop yo kids ass, I understand. When they ass is on AMW in 10 years and u talking bout “my baby is a good boy” and he done raped 10 women and shot 4 niggas, ima beat yo mothafucking ass! So if u scared to beat that ass, just call a nigga like me! I will not only beat they ass for you, I will teach them a lesson in life. In life there can always be a physical confrontation from any form of disrespect. You can not just running around disrespecting people and thinking someone wont physically get in that ass! Its better u teach your child earlier than later. A beat down from they parent, is much better than a gun shot from their peer. So If u don’t wanna whop they ass, hire me! I’ll beat the dog shit outta that damn child! It will be one less child in the streets trying to rob my child!

Your Girl Is A Porn Star

Your Woman Is A Porn Star!

I have realized that a lot of man are not aware that their woman is a porn star. Don’t argue with me nigga, YES SHE IS! She just as nasty as all of them broads in Phat Azz Vol 2.  A lot of men are unaware that every nasty, dirty, kinky thing that they see “Pinky”,” Cheerokee” and “Vanessa Blue” do in porn and think “damn she is nasty as fuck!…..where is my lotion..”, that you have your own personal porn star already. You just got her ass cooking Ramen Noodles and folding up your dirty draws. What you don’t know is, not only WOULD your girl do all that filthy sh*t, she WANTS to do that filthy sh*t! She wants nothing more than to do some nasty sh*t to your ass! You just gotta quit being a bitch ass n*gga and ask. Ive had numerous talks with my boys about sex, and a lot of times they seemed shocked when I say I cum on girls faces. They be like" your girl let you do that?" I’m like EVERY girl lets me do it! So to all of you dudes who haven't been in my inner circle and don’t know the secrets to making your girl a porn star, I'm going to give you the pointers.

First and foremost, you have to understand your nasty ass level of porn star.. me personally, my level up there, but rookie n*gga who don’t know your girl is a porn star, you must discover yours. Now it’s a checkpoint to see just how nasty your girl is. Don’t confuse freaky with nasty. A freaky chick can be just any ol girl, but a nasty girl is the most beautiful thing ever. Now being that my personal favorite is cuming on the face, I will explain to you how to do this. Now keep in mind fellas, this might not be your thing, but no matter what your thing is, your nasty, filthy girl WANTS to do that shit! Trust and believe.

#1. It is a process with busting on a girls face. You cant just come straight out and bust on her face the first time without knowing the rules and cumulations.( yea that’s my word!) You can not, I REPEAT can NOT attempt this act after a bullshit sex session. If u ran in the pussy on some 3 minute sh*t and attempt the face shot, u will probably get slapped! So u better make sure you was going in! Now while doing this, u have to test the girl to make sure your REALLY doing your thing. Its true fellas, girls lie and fake the sh*t all the time. Don’t believe all that moaning and groaning sh*t. N*gga she’s probably had bigger and is thinking about what bag match her shoes or some sh*t. So this is the first thing you must attempt to see how into it she is….. Choke her ass! Yea nigga really! She wants you too! She will not stop you, now u cant over do it though. Don’t choke her until she is blue or nothing, but you give her a slightly aggressive choke. If she say, “n*gga wtf is wrong wit u?”, you are not doing your thing! If she don’t say nothing at all, you have passed step 1.

#2. Now after you have successfully choked her ass, the next thing you want to do is talk some sh*t! Now this is key with finding out if your girl is ready to be pornographic or not. You ask her, “ You like this d**k don’t you?”. If she say “un huh”, got dammit n*gga you are not doing your thing! Now if she say “ F*ck yea!”, then your good! Then you must ask “ Do this p*ssy love this d*ck?” ( now don’t forget to change the word to love. Its important! Even though she might not actually love your ass, if you hitting it right, she do love you at that moment) if she say “Un huh” n*gga she lying, but if she say “she loves that d*ck”, that means she’s talking about her pussy in the 3^rd person. Every woman does this, it don’t matter how bad she is homie she talks to her girl down there. Now once you have got confirmation on this, you can pop the most important question. “So where you want me to cum?”

#3. Now once you get to that question, the girl's response is very important. If her ass say, “what you mean?” then n*gga you are not getting it in and she faked every other step and that there is a bad chick! You have to respect the game and realize she will probably call “Negro number 2” to come over and bring her porn star out later. BUT, if she say “ Wherever you want to!”, your home free home! Now at this point u don’t ask her ass sh*t else! Now you start demanding sh*t! This is the part where  you say “ Im going to put it on your face baby! That’s where you want it baby!”. Her nasty, filthy ass will simply say “yes daddy”.

WARNING: At this point though you have to start including race in this equation. If she is white, Asian or Indian, then you can just wildly get it in, but if she is black or Latin then homie it is important you aim NOT to hit the hair! If a drop hit that hair, she wont be allowing no more face shots for your ass! The sister's do not wanna flat iron her hair for 2 hours because you couldn’t aim.

Now I have gave you all the pointers needed to make your girl a nasty, filthy, slut…. For you!  You can thank me later like Drake! I have more pointers, but if I told you n*ggas ALL the game, then I couldn’t make your girl potentially video tape it with me.. Taaaaa.. I don’t care what you think about your girl, if you thank I'm just talking sh*t, try it and find out that your girl is a porn star!

Ugly People Do Ugly Shit

Ugly People Do Ugly Shit

You ever notice ugly ass people do ugly ass shit? Like you know they're ugly just by the shit they do. Have you ever been out and ran into a ugly person you know and they ask you for your number? You give it to them and they type it in a ugly ass phone? I'm not even talking about like a ugly person even getting at you, it can be a ugly old classmate. Why they ask you to do ugly shit all the time? They always want to invite you to their ugly ass house where they do ugly shit at too. My godsister was telling me last night about a old ugly classmate we had that she gave her number too and I couldn’t help but laugh and think of all the ugly shit she would get asked to do. She's going to get ugly phone calls, invited to ugly ass party's and have ugly drinks. Then she will get invited to a ugly house, where a ugly boyfriend and 3 ugly kids live. They will eat ugly ass dinners and play ugly ass family games. For holidays, they will eat ugly ass thanksgiving turkeys and light up ugly ass fireworks. Then they will tuck their kids into ugly ass beds with ugly ass comforters and read them kids ugly ass bedtime stories about ugly ass bears. When you have problems, they even give you ugly ass advice! How can ugly people do so much ugly shit? See ugly people are special people! Nobody can master the art of ugly shit like ugly people. Look at Reggie Miller, homie was ugly with a ugly jumpshot and wore ugly wristbands but his jumper was GREAT! Look at people like Sam Cassell, he ugly, he had a ugly game, played for ugly teams and wore ugly jerseys and still won 2 rings. Shabba Ranks was a great reggae singer....but one of the ugliest niggas of all time! Jay-Z is ugly with a ugly wife….well naw she a bad bitch! But he got a ugly car…..well naw his whip game is up…but he got a ugly ass….ok well he ugly but the rest of that nigga shit is rather beautiful. Its always a exception to the rule I guess… I guess all ugly people don’t do ugly shit huh?

Yes Your Still A Hoe

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